My Weblog

7 Gypsies ATC Holder....

I showed a pic of this little item after spotting it at CHA last summer. I couldn't wait to get my hands on one. I found one online at ScrapGal a month or so ago. I didn't think twice about the purchase. Plus, I found a bunch of other scrapbook goods I wanted at ScrapGal...they're one of my favorite online stores (shipping is fast and service is great). It took me a while to figure out exactly what I wanted to do with the thing. Ali Edwards turned it into Christmas decor. Heather Birch at Poppy Ink is currently working on an art project with her ATC holder. After much brainstormen', I decided it would be a great way to record the small moments in my life. It's my informal 365 day autobiography. Each day, there are little events that happen that I don't want to forget..I pick one and journal about it on an ATC. I may add a photo or an embellishment to the card to support my story. It then becomes a part of my ATC collection and is added to the rolodex stand.

So far, I'm loven' doing this. I've been trying on new techniques and testing color combinations..there are no rules for me. This is the perfect way to experiment with new ideas..the palette is small and the investment is minimal. The cards blend really well together on the stand. I don't feel a need to "have a theme" per say or keep the cards all looking the same. Most ATC's don't and that's the real benefit of this medium. Here's a few I've worked on in the last couple days;

Inspired

I've been seeing picture mosaics everywhere. Many of the blogs I frequent have a "mosaic of the week". Well, I'm not that disciplined, but I decided to give it a go and try one on for size. It's actually quite addictive...even fun. The best part is when it all comes together in the end. Exciting. Check out the combination of patterns, colors, and shapes. I think I'll be using this combo as inspiration for my next layout. Num.

More tomorrow. Promise.

A few things

This weekend has been farely uneventful for me. I did manage to catch up with the latest "Scrapbook Trends" for November. Funny, cause I totally forgot that I had a layout in this issue. So, I'm flippen' through the pages at the lss to see if it's worth buying and there's little Ethan's face  looken' right up at me. Took me by surprise..wasn't expecting it at all. I wanted to buy the mag right then and there, but told myself to wait. I'll get the issue from ST's in the very near future. Just need to be patient...it will come my way.

I have been spending some time scrapbooking these last few days. I completed a simple, clean layout about Eric. There's a song I listen to quite frequently and one of the lyrics is "I wonder what it will be like to not see those eyes..." It got me thinken' about Eric immediately. Anytime I hear one of those "good bye" songs, I can't help but think about him. The idea of not having Eric a part of my day to day life is painful. I think about it sometimes, but it's difficult to conceptualize when it doesn't even seem possible. I haven't quite conjured up the scenario in my head...I still can't picture it as a part of my reality because it doesn't make sense. He's still here and he's been with me for twelve years...It's something I'm grasping and trying to come to terms with more. Preparing. One can never be prepared for this kind of loss though...It will be the greatest challenge of my life and one I'll be forced to deal with when Eric is ultimately absent. One day, I'll no longer be able to exchange a glance with those loving brown eyes.   

Studio Calico showcased November's  monthly Scrapbooking kit last evening-"Johnny Appleseed" . I did some playing with the kit before it went on sale and here are my latest creations from the gallery:

The kit itself can be seen at Studio Calico and is still available for purchase.

A little something else to check out today-Nicole Harper has a new tutorial up at Studio Calico using one of Maya Road's new sheer albums. Check it out here. It's adorable.

Almost Friday

We've been home from the hospital for almost two days. Eric's doing as well as can be expected. Poor guy. He's not feelen' so great. Two days of general anesthesia, chemo, drugs, and a hospital stay are to blame. Since bringing him home, he's had a lack of appetite, upset stomach, and serious fatigue. He's also feelen' "hazy" and has trouble remembering things. Hopefully, he'll start to feel better within a week. Right now, he can't wait to taper off the steroids..they cause endless hiccupping and stomach upset...making it really difficult to sleep and eat. I just feel for him so much.

The treatment itself was successful. They were able to flood the brain with chemo, which is a good thing. Sometimes, for unknown reasons, the blood brain barrier procedure fails in getting chemo past the blood brain barrier. This was a fear for us. Eric didn't have a ton of time and we needed the disruption to be successful the first time around. It was and we're thankful for it. Of course, we don't yet know if the chemo will be effective in preventing further growth..it will be a month or two before we know for sure.

One of the things I'm most grateful for as our family walks this journey is the constant stream of support we get from family and friends. There's been one person in particular that's given us a ton of support and we're so blessed to have her in our lives-My mother-in-law/Eric's mom (Kathy). She's been our anchor. She attends to us each and every day, including Ethan (especially Ethan). Recently, we decided it would be really beneficial for Eric if she spent more time in our home. So, she's been helping me care for my family these last few days. This has allowed me some time to do somethings for myself. Just today, for the first time (in a long time), I went shopping (no baby!). This is a big deal for me. Laugh. I'm totally serious. I was so excited. Usually, I have a baby in cart and a two hour window of time to use for running errands. Not today. It felt so good. I actually bought two pairs of new comfy pants, some goodies at Archivers, and did a big'ol grocery trip at Trader Joes (my new favorite grocery store). I even got to try on clothes!! Wow...that just doesn't happen anymore. It was too much fun for one day. I felt super lucky. Honestly, moments like this are refreshing and brings me peace of mind. This allows me to be a better caretaker for my family. I'm grateful for the help of loved ones. They make this possible. 

I also got to do some scrapbooking (again, thanks to my MIL) last night. I finished up a layout. Sharing it with all of ya today. Within this last month or so, Ethan has been on the loose. He is crawling everywhere and Momma can't keep up. One minute he's there and the next minute he's not. I love it. It allows him more freedom and gives him more options for playing. He's discovering all sort of new things too...like the electrical outlets, door stoppers, cabinets, and all the other dangerous things that baby's want to know about. I've been working on baby proofing the house. It seems like everyday that something has to be changed or rearranged. Today, he found his way to the steps. The one place I don't want him hanging out. I'm sure tomorrow it will be something else. Isn't it always that way with kids? Never ends..not even after they leave the house (which is what my dad tells me..smile.) Gotta luv them.

Mr.Curious....

One last note-my layouts will be up at Studio Calico on September 28th. I did three layouts and a card. Of course, I'll post them here too, but not until a few days after the November kit reveal.

A few pics to pass the time...

Just got home from the hospital. Was there with Eric all day. It was his first day of the new chemo blood brain barrier treatment. We weren't sure what to expect, but it's turned out to be a lot more than we were prepared for. It's proving to have more side effects and risks.  Eric has been ill for most the day and half unconscience. It's a lot to take in and I'll go into details later. I'm exhausted tonight.

It's late in the evening, so I thought I'd leave you with a few photos to pass the time till I update the blog. Just a few pics of Ethan I took yesterday while we were hanging outside in the front yard and playing with the leaves. Catchen' a little action-

I usually don't do much seasonal decorating around the house, but I love displaying a seasonal item on my front door once in a while..it makes for a warm welcome.

 

passing the time

I've been trying to keep myself focused and distracted these last few weeks. I find myself grieving often. It sneaks up on me when I'm not expecting it. Yesterday, on my way to Woodbury to run errands, I found myself crying in the car. It usually finds me when I'm alone and when my mind is free to wonder aimlessly. I could be in the middle of making lunch or feeding Ethan a bottle. The grief comes in waves. I can't predict it and I can't prevent it. I let it happen because I know it's part of dealing with the sorrow. It's there and unavoidable. At times, it's all consuming. So, when I find myself with nothing to do, I work on the things that bring me peace of mind and enjoyment. My escape. Lately, that escape has been scrapbooking. I love looking at my photos and finding stories to preserve and share with Ethan. He's the reason I scrapbook. This week, I've been doing lot's of scrapbooking. I just finished up my design work for Studio Calico this month and I also did a few layouts about myself. Of course, I can't show you the layouts from Studio Calico just yet, but I will share the other layouts. One layout is rather simple (at least for me in terms of design), but it sheds light on a more serious topic. Moving Forward...looking ahead. The other layout is about my life long passion for crafting and being a crafty mom. I have a long history in various mediums. My longest running medium was beading, but I've also done a lot of quilting, fabric dyeing, knitting, garment sewing, painting, and drawing. Before Ethan was born, I spent endless hours knitting up hats for the little guy. I would frequent the local knit shops in search of cool hand dyed wool skeins. I would then make him hat after hat cause they were super easy to knit up and they were quick too. I made quite a few (he's grown out of most of the hats already..arg!). The one on the layout below is my all time favorite though...vibrant and colorful (and it still fits him). Sooo me. Wish I had more time to knit these days, but I don't see that happening anytime soon. Laugh. Smile. Still enjoy the hobby though...

Today we're going to Eric's work to catch up with his coworkers. This is Eric's last good week before starting the new chemo next Monday. We decided to schedule the visit today so everyone can see him while he's doing well. We're really excited to catch up with everyone..they've all been extremely supportive and generous. It's been a long time since Eric's been at work. His cubical is still there waiting for him...I can't wait for him to see it.

Thank You...

I just wanted to send out a quick thanks to all of you who read my blog and have been sending me notes of support. I'm grateful for all the prayers coming our way. It means so much to Eric and I to know that so many wonderful people are thinking about us during a time of need. Right now, we are facing the greatest challenge of our lives. As the cancer progresses, it only gets harder. Your support helps us get through each day....thank you everybody!

Photo copyrighted by "Krysten Halek Photography"

More Growth

At this point in our lives we had no idea what was waiting for us behind that door. In 2002, Eric and I were newly married and moving into our first and only home. We were young. I was 25 and Eric was 29. Looking back at these old photo's brings back memories of the beginning. The life before the cancer. Man, what a completely different way of being...it was an exciting time for the both of us. We were making big plans for the future. We built this house. We had plans to settle here and have a family. We were going to grow old together in this place. These things have happened in a small sort of way, but God has different plans for us now. Times are changing...

I brought Eric to the hospital yesterday for a visit with his chemo doctor, Dr. Truscheim. Eric had an MRI earlier yesterday before the doctors visit. Dr.Truscheim informed us that Eric's brain cancer is spreading. It's growing rapidly in a few places. The largest area of growth is located in the right back ventricle area. It's circular and moving out from the ventricle wall. The second largest area of growth is located in the right front ventricle area. There are also two or three other areas where the cancer is growing, but at a slower rate. It wasn't good news. Eric is starting a more aggressive chemo treatment next week; the blood brain barrier disruption. We've been told that it may or may not be effective. The goal of the treatment is to prohibit further growth and also, to decrease the size of the tumor tissue already formed within the brain at the various locations. The chemo will be more invasive. It requires two days of general anesthesia (in a row). Four days recovery. He'll be extremely tired for about a week (he will sleep most of the time) and the rest of the time, his fatigue level will go up by 10%.  This is the only option we have left at Fairview. Eric will have to go to a different facility if he wishes to seek out test trials...something we may not have time for at this point.

 

Sneaks

I know, I don't update the blog much these days. This week has been a game of catch up and sleep. Believe it or not, it's also been a very productive scrapbooking week for me. I've been working on my design team stuff for Studio Calico and just finished up the layouts. I've been mostly scrappen' at night when things are quiet and I have more than five minutes to give to my work. I used to scrap a ton during the day, but with a child at my hip, that's no longer possible. So, I'm posting a few sneak peaks of the finished layouts. Can't show them to ya of course, but heck, the good stuff is in the details.

Since arriving home, I've been out and about looking for new scrapbook goodness. Since last summer's CHA, I've been waiting patiently for one paper line's release and that would be "Noteworthy" by Making Memories. This stuff makes my heart pitter patter with joy. My favorite, the super cool ledger sticker letters..oh myyyy. Darn right nummy. I picked up most of the line at my lss this week. It now sits at my desk and it won't be going in any of my drawers anytime soon. This stuff is delish.

I did pick up Ali Edward's new book "Life Artist". I love her work, but I couldn't duplicate it if I tried. It's all her own. It's all about graphics and clean lines. I'm certainly inspired by what she does though and credit her for constantly coming up with new ideas. Always feels like she's reinventing the wheel. I explore her stuff for ideas and her stories. Her in depth analysis on life can be too much for some people, but for me, it works.  I enjoy the everyday moments. I live my life minute to minute. Each minute has something to offer. I don't want to miss out, so I scrap it. This latest book is exactly that and her work has gotten even better. Definitely worth buying.

Eric's got a week off chemo. He'll start the new chemo treatment next week. Tomorrow, he has an MRI and an appointment with his chemo doc. More than likely, we'll see new growth, but the growth should be minimal. The new chemo treatment isn't usually effective till the third monthly treatment (it's given monthly). We will see some growth till that point. As of right now, Eric's doing great. No significant neurological changes or issues. He does spend at least half his days sleeping though, which is very typical for someone at this stage with brain cancer. It's also a side effect of the accumulating chemo...take the good with the bad. That's the life of the cancer survivor.

Hawaii

Just getting into the swing of things again. Feelen' Jet lag still. I could use a few days of uninterrupted sleep, but I don't think that will be happening anytime soon. Laugh. Funny how that works...go on vacation to relax and come home tired. It certainly was worth it. Hawaii was beautiful. We stayed in a luxury condo on the west coast of Maui. The views were spectacular. The condominium was part of a private gated community that sat right up along the ocean. It was the perfect location for us to relax and enjoy ourselves. We spent our days visiting local towns in search of good food, white beaches, unique shops, and spectacular views. Maui had it all plus a few extras. So much to see and do..at the same time, it's easy doing nothing on the island because the atmosphere is really relaxed. Lot's of places to just sit back and take it easy. We did that too. It was the perfect vacation for the two of us. Couldn't of been any better...some pics from the island...

The condominium & the views.

 

We spent a day in Paia together while on the island. It's a small town located on the North part of the island. The culture in Paia is very colorful. No two people are alike in this town. It's a peace loven' atmosphere and the epitome of "cool". The surfers hang out here and so do the ladies looking for the latest trendy gear. While we visited Paia, we did a lot of people watching and we also came across a small Buddhist monastery. Erics been wanting to visit a Buddhist monastery for years. He's a Buddhist of sorts (more into Zen Buddhism). The timing couldn't of been better. We were lucky enough to get a tour of the monastery (inside and out) and to see the new prayer Stuppa? that was being built outside the monastery. We were told that the Dalai Lama blessed the monastery during his trip to Maui a few months back...and there we stood. Amazing.

Lahaina was another gorgeous town I visited while on Maui. More great views, fun shopping, and open air restaurants (most of the restaurants on the island are open to the outdoors).

Many cool surf shops on the island. One on every corner. Surfing is a way of life in Hawaii.

Napili Beach. One of the best beaches on the island.

One of the beaches located right next to our condominium. A hidden gem. Check out the surfer...something Minnesota folks don't see everyday. Smile.